” The strongest people have known defeat, suffering, struggle, and loss…yet have still found their way out of the depths.” – M.W.W
In a previous message I wrote about the lie “pain is something you can see”, and now I wanted to touch on this idea that people tend to believe.. that in order to be strong, you should never allow yourself to feel that pain.
Now, on one hand I can completely understand being strong for the sake of others. Situations like times of family passing or being a strong hold for someone who is in pain rather than you. Being strong in these moments by holding in your own pain is something that I think is a very selfless act.
Suppressing you own pain, struggle, loss, etc…that YOU feel within your own life, however, is only harming you. Think of it like cutting your foot on a shard of glass from an empty bottle while walking on the beach. Its shocking, you immediately feel pain rush throughout your body… so what do you do? I can tell you that you don’t continue walking as if nothing happened…
You stop what you’re doing, sit down and take the time to look at the cut that is on your foot, recognize that you have been hurt, and start the healing process… You wash it out to rid it of any dirt or bacteria that might have gotten in, you put antibiotics on it to prevent it from future infection and ALLOW IT TO HEAL.
You don’t pick at the scab. You don’t ignore the pain.
You DO something about it.
With that, apply the same process to the “injuries” within in your own heart and mind.
Say, you lose your job, or the person you have loved for so long leaves, maybe you leave them?… or maybe you lose that friendship that you thought would last forever. These sudden, and excruciating instances in life are just like stepping on a glass shard on the beach. You do not just walk away and move on as if your heart was not just ripped from your chest.
These “defining moments” in our lives are meant to give us the opportunity to grow and become the people we are meant to be. But in order to make sure that you are healing and becoming stronger, you need to allow it to hurt.
You need to feel the pain, accept it, learn from it and work through it. Also know the process isn’t going to be complete overnight… just as a cut will not heal itself by the next morning.
It’s about having the courage to ask for a time out, to shed a tear, to dust yourself off, and then get back in the ring to fight like you’ve never fought before.
But before you put those gloves back on… remember this:
You must be fighting FORWARDS, not backwards.
What I’m saying is, get back in there, and fight for YOU, fight for what YOU want, and what YOU deserve. Not for something or someone that did not fit you anyways.
Begging for that job back, or that relationship/friendship that has already proven to not be the right path for you will only inhibit your journey to something greater.
As I always say: “You cannot fit a triangle into a circle, not matter how hard you try”
I wish you all many journeys in this lifetime…the good…and the bad.
I truly hope that you learn to trust your process and be kind to yourself. And most of all, have the courage to allow yourself to feel pain…because without it, we wouldn’t know what it is, to truly have stregnth.